1 Question that I have asked myself throughout my life is “What do I want to do ?”
The answers changed with time and age.
Let me take you through my answers and I am confident that you will feel that its your answers too !
When I was really small, may be in senior KG or 1st standard I confidently rose up and said to myself
” I want to become a doctor” :)
with a big smile on my face and confidence in my heart I was sure that I will be Dr.Rushabh Hathi.
Why doctor? Because II had recently been operated upon and I saw the doctor used a stethoscope ! I loved that instrument and mother had said that if you want to use it the you have to be a doctor.!!
As time passed……..I stated watching cricket .
Then I wanted to be a cricketer . Sachin Tendulkar .
Why? because I saw a match where he was the man of the match and he got a car !
Beautiful it was and to get that car , I wanted to become a cricketer !\
After that I went to see a movie starring Salman Khan. Wow, what muscles he had! what fighting he did ! His one puch blew the villian away !
Now I wanted to be an actor !
In my 5th standard my parents asked me jokingly “So finally what have you decided ?”
I answered ” I want to be a doctor who plays cricket and acts in films !!!”
As time passed the cruelty of life murdered my innocent childhood.
In SSC I again answered the same question
” Actually I don’t like biology so I cant become a doctor !”
“No worries now want to become a CEO of the company”
Why CEO- I did not even know the fullform of CEO but knew that CEO is a person who is very rich and travels in a black color car !
I dropped Biology and did vocational course in electronics.
And whenever I was studying science , I always told myself, I will be a scientist and invent something so my photo also comes in text book.
So now I wanted to become a CEO who was a scientist, who acted in films and played cricket !!
Then after i cleared SSC(Please dont ask marks !!) I heard there is something called IIT.
So I joined a class which trained us in entrance exam for IIT.
The course and teachers there were excellent.
They helped my wipe my ambitions of becoming a “SUPER-CEO” and helped to cultivate an ambition of becoming an IITian.
I started looking at IITians as aliens !! Only they are respected and great !
But now my latest dream was to become an IITian.!
But the gravitational pull of physics was too high and probablilty in maths was tooo low and the chemical reaction was exothermic, so I could not clear IIT exam !!
Now what , I was looking for an ambition.
Then I got into mumbai university engineering college and as alwayz I was full of hopes.
In the first year, i saw my seniors making a robot.
I wanted to become a robot scientist.
Now I was matured enough to know that I had to study but study what ?
I went to my professor , he laughed and told me “That subject is not taught !!”
So that ambition was gone!
So again I was looking for a ambition.
Then as days passed, I observed that there are few guyz whom everybody loved.
I wondered why and then realized that those are toppers…
heheheeh……now I wanted to be a topper.
I decided that I will top the next coming exam. And to gods grace I did. But from bottom…
Then as time passed I was getting exposed to the real world.Now I was more practical.
I wanted to become a team lead in INFOSYS !
Wow…so engineering helped me come down from CEO to TEAM LEAD !
In my final year, when recruitement interviews took place, I changed my ambition again.
Now I wanted to become a simple programmer.
So from doctor to CEO to TEAM LEAD to a PROGRAMMER !!
What a journey.
And yes I had realized by then that I cant be an actor since I was not a “KHAN”,”KAPOOR” or “BACHCHAN”
I also realized I cannot be a cricketer because I did not have any money to give to selectors.!!
Today I know what to do.I have to earn to support my living.I also know how to do it.
When I look back, I think, that there was an age where my ambitions were completely illogical and childish but I was happy.
I wanted to become a doctor because I loved stethoscope but today I know I need 50 lacs donation to get into a medical college.
I wanted to become a police officer because I wanted to beat bad guyz like Amitabh Bachchan did.Today I know that the only merit required to become a police officer is “CORRUPT” !!
I wanted to become a CEO because I wanted to wear that black blazer and travel in the black car.Today I know that If I want to become a CEO, MY father has to be one !
Today I understand the reality , I understand the way world works and understand the place I am.
But I also understand that I was more happy before.
I was more happy in my world of dreams where everything was possible than I am in this real world where we are ruled by SYSTEM and CORRUPTION.
Today if somebody askes me what I want to become I would say
“The 5 year child I was ”